right now

i'm in this mess that i'd like to dig out of but i'm not sure if its going to be so easy. i only wish things could be easy, because they always become so tangled and complex. i can handle complex, but its complicated. and sometimes i find it so much easier to give up. i'm probably going through another one of those 'big steps' in your life right now but its been so camouflaged by the shit thats gone down.

either way.... i have a whole lot to say to you still, and i'm pretty sure it will remain unsaid. oh well. maybe its better that way.

im thinking of you harder

i love coming back

list

i have various things i need to take care of:
1. united didnt send me nor my father a confirmation email... although they deducted miles from my fathers account. i gotta check on that.
2. clean room?
3. clean fish tank
4. cancel order on pants. ugh. why did i order pants online? i never fit in pants. haha whatev
5. make more money.
6. july is vacation time. this is exciting.
7. loans for college
8. become friends with my roommates. (besides alison, of course)
9. place order for laptop.

oh god, so its already july and i have so many weeks until college. god. god god god.